Brought to you by huge doses of cold meds...

Well I've got the crud. It started on Sunday with a throat that was a little sore, yesterday it was sore all day, then the congestion really hit, and this morning I was miserable. But, since today is my day off, I took a dose of cold meds after I got the boys to their respective places and slept an extra two hours and now I'm feeling decent. Still kinda cruddy, but not miserable at least.

But, even with the crud, I'm less miserable than poor Not-So-Ex right now. He had been used to running a bunch of small electrical jobs but now he's stuck on a big job at a chemical plant. A very dangerous chemical plant. And now, as the big jobs tend to do, the overtime has begun. He will work 60 hours this week. It would suck at any point but, coming off the vasectomy, it's extra tough on him.

During our first marriage, he always used to say that, every time he mentioned overtime, he could see me mentally adding up his paycheck. And it is true that, when he's on overtime, he makes more per hour than I make in a day. But it puts so much stress on him and on me too. He's exhausted and in pain. I feel guilty for being home when he would give anything to be here. I feel guilty for not being exhausted... for not being in pain. And, on days when I do work, I feel guilty for how little I can contribute financially.

And, more than anything, I just miss him. We only have the very early mornings (and I should point out here that neither of us is at our best in those early morning hours) and the evenings together. I miss just being with him.

And I also realize just how much I depend on him. It seems like I can never get anything really done without him, which makes me feel useless. I'm trying to do better since the overtime has started, so hopefully I can start taking care of more stuff, whether it's normally his department or not. In the long run, there's no reason I can't continue the house renovation work on my own. He's shown me what to do and how to use some of the tools I'm not familiar with. I lived for three years on my own, I should be able to handle everything now too. I've just gotta get used to it.

At the end of the day, it will all be worth it. The extra money will help ensure that we can get away for our anniversary. And that down time, with absolutely no responsibilities, should feel extra sweet after all the constant work. And, of course, there are other things too. A vacation further down the road, a trip to Pittsburg in Nov, a new couch that is desperately needed, and, of course, saving for a house. We've been feeling so pulled towards buying an old house and slowly renovating it. And God knows that will require serious money.

But we'll see what happens. Right now, getting through each day is accomplishment enough!

Monday mornings

You know, Mondays sure are different these days. It used to mean dragging myself out of bed and going to a job that was ok - not horrible, but not anything special. Now it means helping my loves get out of bed and get to places they'd rather not go and then I return home to recover from busy weekends.

And this weekend was a doozy. Rena had a big assignment due in Spanish that required her to do a weather report completely in Spanish and film it. Now this should have been easy since I've been a film student for, like, EVER. But the only camcorder I have is a non-working one. So I panicked for a bit but then realized my iPhone could handle it.

The Sunday morning was spent slaving away at the bakery (LOL) and the afternoon was spent filming Rena. While I was worried about using the iPhone, it turned out to be a breeze. In a moment of silliness, we even edited this commercial in! I was pretty pleased with the end result. And it also reminded me how much I love editing. That's something I hadn't gotten to do in forever.

We also received a wonderful gift from a family member yesterday, which hopefully means our little family will get to take another mini vacation (one that hopefully will not involve an ER visit) at the end of Oct. Why the end of Oct, you might ask? Because Not-So-Ex and I will be celebrating our anniversary. It will be our First Anniversary (take two) and it will be delightful to just run away for the weekend with every one of our wedding guests (our two kids). We're hoping for a nice hotel, beautiful weather, and no worries for a weekend. And no Jake the Wonder Mutt or Lucy the Asthmatic Demon Dog to make messes for us! Hopefully it'll be awesome.

So, anyway, now I am catching up on all the DVR stuff from last night. There are just too many good things to watch on Sunday night. Dexter premiered last night and I'm excited to see what's coming up this season with my favorite serial killer. Right now I'm watching Boardwalk Empire for the second time. I have to watch the episodes twice to try to catch everything. I do believe Boardwalk Empire may take the award for the most beautiful show on television. It has a richness and scope that is unheard of. Really, really beautiful stuff. And last, but never, EVER least is a previous most beautiful show winner, Mad Men. This year's not so pretty, but I don't mean that in a bad way. Don Draper's world is caving in. The most beautiful woman in the world, Joan, is having another abortion because she got pregnant by the wrong guy. And Roger Sterling, who has the best grey hair in the entire world, loses everything via Lucky Strikes. But, on the plus side, Peggy (the one I've always identified most with) is coming into her own. With all of these deep, incredible shows occurring the same night, Monday morning is like my second chance!

Well I better get back to my DVR and then the real world!

It's about to get spooky around here!

So I'm getting ready to head to the bakery and I'm starting to get excited about all the fun stuff I can do there next month, since it will mean the start of the Halloween season. I have visions of ghosts, witches, zombies, and their favorite brains floating through my noggin.

And, on the Halloween tip, Jacque Jo, ETW, and I have been throughly enjoying planning what would be the best costumes ever. We've decided we should be the three backup singers from our mutual favorite song (NSFW). Although we are still missing one crucial piece; we still need our Cee Lo. But I guess, if that plan falls, I could go as an XBox... or am I an Atari? Hmmmmm... Who are we kidding... I'm an Atari.

Oh well... time to stop daydreaming and start getting ready. Later!

Now that I'm all napped up...

So everyone in the house overslept today. And, while I hate that it messes up Not-So-Ex's schedule, I was thrilled to not have to run all over the place doing everyone's drop offs and pick ups. Then, once everyone got headed out, I went back to bed for a bit.

But now I'm back up and all rested and stuff, so I should get to work. I'm already working on dishes, then there's some picking up to do and I'm gonna try to get some work done on cleaning these floors. And, if I can get the nerve to venture into the super scary basement, I might get some laundry done too. But, no matter what I'm doing, I have a feeling Arrested Development will continuously be playing in the background!

Tomorrow I get to hit the bakery for a bit. Hopefully they've sold tons and I'll be swamped with lots of baking. If not, at least I know I have a special order to do.

Hmmmmmmm...

In an incredibly rare turn of events, I have today off and I'm actually feeling pretty darn good. Not exhausted. Not frustrated. Just chilled and in a good mood.

So what shall I do today? Well I'm starting off watching the new Sons of Anarchy that I DVRed last night. And doing some web window shopping since I have some birthday money to spend (WOOT)! But, longer term, my plan is to clean up the kitchen, plan a nice dinner, do a little shopping (grocery and shoe mainly), plus a little dog snuggling time.

Actually I think I'll start with that last item first since Jake the Wonder Mutt just jumped up and snuggled in on the couch with me. God I love my big ole West Virginia Brown Dog! And Lucy's not even being too obnoxious right now. Go fig.

I'm gonna go enjoy it while it lasts!

Update: Just gotta say, Stephen King on Sons of Anarchy... genius!!!!

A little smile...

So I had a frustrating day at the bakery cause things are really slow these days. Hopefully, since the bakery itself is still kinda new and having my cupcakes there is new too, it'll pick up a lot in the next few months. If not, I'll have to get another job, which I would rather not do. LOL

Anyway, I've heard this song (both the edited version below and the unedited) several times lately but today it really made me smile. So I just had to post it.

Now that you're grinning, go get some cupcakes!!!

What a day!

So I turned 34 today. That's right, I cop to my age too! But anyway, it was a truly wonderful day.

I spent the morning in the bakery. Now, yes, it did suck to be up at the crack of dawn on my b-day, but I loved spending the early hours cupcaking. I overdid it just a bit though. Several hours and about 8 dozen cupcakes later, I left with aching feet, back and wrists.

Now at this point I think I should point out whose fault it is that I was in pain. Mine. Completely. My boss gives me a starting time and I leave when I'm done. But Sundays offer me a very special opportunity. I have the day and the kitchen to myself. No one messing with the ovens while I'm baking. No one needing the Kitchenaid. So I try to bake as much as I can and save them for later in the week when both time and space will be lacking. And I should also say that its mostly an enjoyable exhaustion.

So I came home from the bakery to find a husband that had been working like mad while I was gone. He fixed me a huge dinner (fixed my favorite even) and even made homemade Double Doozies for me. How could that be anything less than perfection? And did he top it? Yep. He gave me a gift of a cupcake apron, cupcakes oven mitts, and cupcake kitchen towels. It was wonderful.

Now I'm sitting here watching Boardwalk Empire (finally!) and trying to calm down from my amazing day. Here's hoping I'll be able to slow down (even if its due to benadryl) and get some sleep!

Things that are frustrating me right this second...

1. Pain sucks. When someone you love is in pain, even though you both knew it would hurt for a while, and you can't fix anything, it sucks. 12 hours ago Not-So-Ex had his surgery and he's been hurting progressively worse the last few hours. Now he's in bed and hopefully either asleep or soon to be. Times like these make me wish I was a better nurse.

2. Not understanding sucks. My 3rd grade son started Spanish this year and I tried to help him with his homework the past two nights and couldn't. Now, while I would never say that I know Spanish, I know enough to help a third grader. But the way the material is presented just doesn't make any sense to me. How do I know whether a black and white picture of a person standing in front of a window through which you can see a sun is referring to "Good Morning" or "Good Afternoon?" And is a picture of two people shaking hands supposed to mean "Hello" or "Goodbye?" My choice would have been "Nice to meet you," but that wasn't an option. And my frustration transferred right over to my son who came up to me, well over an hour after we quit studying, and asked if I would really be upset if he didn't do well. It broke my heart that he was worried about passing a test in third grade.

3. Blockbuster sucks. I'm a netflix chick but, when they don't have what I want available instantly, I will run to Blockbuster rather than wait for them to mail it. And so it went with the second season of Sons of Anarchy. They had disc 1, 3, and 4. WTF.

4. Cable sucks (sometimes). This is the time of year when there is sooooooo much going on in tv land, but why is it never happening when I'm in need of entertainment? Like today. I knew that Not-So-Ex and I would be sitting here most of today (although I thought I would be working tomorrow, which turns out to not be the case) but, while there are a slew of new shows I'm into starting up in the next week, not a thing is going on now. So I'm on my second viewing of a Sons of Anarchy disc. While I don't mind, I'd rather have a new Chuck or something like Boardwalk Empire (both of which I am DYING for) to fill my time. But I guess I should be glad that the blueray is hooked up again so at least Veronica Mars can fill some of tomorrow's down time.

Ok... gonna quit whining now.

Oops... here's an update...

So I haven't written in several days cause it's just been sooooooooo busy!

I worked today (and Frutcake has Berry Lemonade, Fresh Apple and Peanut Butter, and Peanut Butter Boston Cream Pie Cupcakes to show for it) after I slept through most of my Monday off. That always makes for a busy day.

But, tomorrow, I have another day off. And Not-So-Ex has the rest of the week off. Cause he's having a certain surgical procedure. Which means I'll spend the rest of the week babying him. Or at least trying.

So wish us both luck! LOL

Random thoughts on my day off...

So I've been home for less than a half hour and my day off is already in effect. I immediately found Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid on cable. How did I miss this movie? I love, love, love noir and silly noir is even better. Plus, black and white young Steve Martin in period clothing is kinda cute. Who knew?

Seussy Goodness and Stuff

Sorry for the blurry pics! Shaky hands!

So tonight there was a fund raiser for the local Read Aloud program and it was Dr. Seuss themed. And they ordered sugary goodness from the bakery where I work. And I cranked out 150+ mini cupcakes. And it was a blast!

Tomorrow is my day off but I have to stop in for a few minutes to frost some cupcakes for the case that didn't get frosted today. After that, it is totally my intention to spend the rest of the day watching tv that I've missed out on during the week. Cause, you know, that's my idea of heaven on earth.

Since I mentioned tv, I have to personally thank FX for replacing my crush on Tommy Gavin, which was sooooooo two years ago, with a new, growing fascination with Jax. He's young, rough, incredibly idealistic, and conflicted. Plus he really, really looks like he needs someone to take care of him. And I'm such a sucker for a needy bunch of trouble. But, anyway, if you aren't all up on SAMCRO, you totally should be. And, since the new season just started last Tues, you won't be too far behind. And you can get the past two seasons on Netflix too (like I did).

There ya go. I've just provided you with many, many hours of entertainment. You can thank me later!

Day Off!

So I have a day off from the bakery. And it seems that won't be such a rare thing since they are now slowing me down to three days a week, which was the original plan. It's a good thing, especially today, since my back was bothering me again after work and this morning too. Not serious pain like the other day, just annoyance.

But I'm sitting here obsessing, as is my habit. I need a new chocolate cupcake recipe. All the ones I've tried fail as often as they turn out, which is seriously irritating. I would never have guessed how much of an effect the change in baking venues would have on my cupcakes. Recipes that have worked time and again at home turn out differently, or not at all, in the bakery. It makes for frustrating early days, but I know I'll figure out what works and what doesn't and then it will be easier going.

Outside of the bakery, things are going mostly smoothly. The renovations are going slower now, which is nice cause it means I get some slow days without guilt! And working less will mean I can cook more, which is also good news. We're starting to save up for our big cruise in Feb, plus we have a short trip to Pittsburg in Nov, so lots to look forward to.

But, for now, I mainly look forward to getting dinner started and having a big meal for the fam this evening! So I guess I should get started!

It's not a vacation till I'm in the ER...

So we had a short vacay over the weekend and, as has happened on more than one occasion, I ended up in the ER. This time it was simple, but painful.

I woke up in serious back pain. We had already had a vacation chock full of fail, so I didn't want to make the kids leave in a hurry (we had promised them more swimming time). So I got ready and went to the ER to see if I could get some pain medication that would allow me to sleep some while the kids swam and then make it through the ride home. And they were more than happy to help me out.

When I was in and out of the ER so quickly, I thought my day was headed in the right direction but, alas, it wasn't quite so simple. I got back to the hotel, took my medicine, and then ate breakfast with the fam. My back started feeling some better but, around the time we got in the car, I started feeling really, really queasy. And exhausted.

The drive home couldn't have been much fun for poor Not-So-Ex. He was warned that he may have to pull over at any time. And, when I wasn't busy feeling gross, I was semi-catatonic. But he had a stroke of genius about an hour from home and stopped to get me some stomach medicine which I sipped (picture the bottle of Benadryl from the movie Hitch) the rest of the way. So, by the time we got home, I was less sick and more exhausted.

Now I've been home long enough to sleep it off and I'm feeling much better. And I'm so glad we have tomorrow off again so we can all rest after so much craziness.

One of my favorite words ever

So I have a few minutes before I have to head to the bakery. I'm all fresh and clean and sitting here in my comfy kitchen pants and a thin, bright green tee ready to whip eggs and take names... or something like that anyway.

I'll admit that the schedule change has been a bit tough on me. While I'm glad there aren't any more 4 ams (at least during the school week), the procedure for getting everyone delivered to their work and school has worn me out. But it's just going to be a matter of getting used to it.

But I have a three day weekend! And my weariness from the schedule change made one of my favorite words sound just a wee bit sweeter when Not-So-Ex said it yesterday.

Vacation. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh.

So we'll be taking a mini-break this weekend for some good food, a hotel pool, and some time with no doggers to clean up after, no dishes piling up, and no laundry to do. Could it be any better?

But to get to the mini-break, I have one more day of cupcaking to do. It's funny how quickly they've caught on. Yesterday I went to put out a fresh batch of cupcakes only to have a guy buy every single one we had. It was pretty awesome till I realized it meant I had to hurry up and make more.

Anyway, hope all of you get your own mini-break this weekend! Even if it's at home.

Awesome things about my job (pt 1)

So I love the bakery. I love the baking, obviously, but I love the environment even more. I work in a small, organic bakery is a medium sized (and that's being generous) city. The owners of the bakery own two other locavore restaurants in this small, historic area.

And yesterday I had zombies in the bakery. And they liked my cupcakes. LOL

Well ok, it was just for a photo shoot for HallowEast. But it made for a really fun afternoon.

On a side note, my cupcakes are catching on really well. I had a slow start due to testing out my recipes in a new place and new oven. Plus that fact that my ingredients are all organic now. But the amount of freedom I've been given is amazing. The chef was going over my duties and telling me what needed made and, after going through some of the store's standard offerings that I've begun making, I asked about cupcake flavors. He told me I was a cupcake artist and he wanted me to use my creativity and create whatever I wanted. It felt good. And it felt even better when he walked in today and saw the arrangement of cupcakes in the display and immediately came back to tell me how gorgeous they were.

So I'll go back tomorrow and make some new, exciting experiments. Soooooo much fun.