Better late than never...

So I've known about this for a while but was sworn to secrecy first and then got sidelined by doggers and houses second. The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia has a distribution deal with Robert DeNiro's Tribeca Films. Apparently the film will hit video on demand first around the end of April, then a short theatrical run (the initial idea was to release in NYC and LA, but the director is pushing a run in TN, WV and smaller markets), and then DVD release.

*Disclaimer - I was the associate producer on this film but I in no way recommend it to the faint of heart. It is graphic. It is sad. It is painful. But I also believe it gives a portrait of addiction that is incredibly raw. It was hard to live the story and I find it equally difficult to watch.*

Anyway, despite the content of the film, the project itself was a blessing for me and I would love to see the people I worked with move on up the Hollywood ladder. I also happen to know that, if the film manages to turn a profit (a rarity for documentaries), there are plans in place for those funds that will benefit the White family's future.

Why I love Cupcake Hero

I was telling my bloggy buddy Jacque Jo the other day that I just love Cupcake Hero time because there's such a spike in my blog traffic. But I also hate when Cupcake Hero time happens to coincide with a time like the past couple weeks where I've been so overwhelmed with personal stuff that I haven't even baked. It only makes sense that, when cupcake fans come calling, I should have plenty of new recipes available to grab their interest.

But, every once in a while, I'm reminded of the thing that is truly miraculous about the blog world. You can follow a link looking for one thing and find something you didn't even think you were looking for. Or someone can find you when they didn't even know they were looking for you. And that happened to me over the weekend.

I received an email from the mom of a 5 yr old boy with Aspergers. She told me that hearing the stories about my daughter gave her hope. And I can't even explain how much that meant.

For many years, I kept what was going on with my daughter a secret. At a certain point I became too weak to hide that there were problems, but I still never dared tell the full truth. And, to be honest, there are elements that I probably will never be able to talk about. But for years, you would never, ever hear me mention the term Aspergers. My little girl couldn't be autistic. I couldn't or, to be more honest, wouldn't accept it.

As I read this other mom's blog, I was transported back to the past for a second. I remembered those moments, both the terrible and the beautiful. I remembered the times I broke down on Not-So-Ex (who was my actual ex at the time) and he had to comfort a woman who though her daughter was lost. But I also remembered those first few times when I saw the cloud lift and my daughter re-emerge. And those wonderful times were what kept me trying, even after the heartbreak of watching her fall back into the cloud again.

So I would like to say to this mom, and any others, the thing that her doctor said to me one day that meant everything.

This is not because of you. You did not cause this and you can't fix it either. All that you can do is do the best that you can. Sometimes you will fail, and that's ok. Because they need to know that everyone fails. Sometimes things will work and sometimes they won't. But the most important thing is that you keep trying.

And I would also add my own advice as well. Above all else, protect your child. And never let anyone disrespect your knowledge or understanding of your child. Work with your doctor, but do not let their words trump your knowledge or intuition because they can fail too. And, above all else, cherish the good moments. Your child may never be "normal", but they will be so much cooler than that because they'll be themselves.

Sweet, sweet Friday...

So I am truly worn down today. In part, that's normal for a Friday but this week it's kicked up a notch due to all the craziness. So here is what I am looking forward to this weekend:

1. Not worrying about the house.

I'm in the process of providing more and more paperwork for the mortgage guy in hopes of being able to save the house deal. While I'm glad there's a chance, it is exhausting. Every time you think "Yay! Got that last elusive piece of paper," you get a call or email saying "I also need x, y, & z." Since it will be the weekend, there won't be a single thing I can get. So that pressure will be off.

2. Bringing Lucy home.

Not-So-Ex just called to check on Lucy and the vet said we can pick her up today! I'm so thrilled! We may have to keep her separated from the Jakester, but we'll figure that out somehow. Also, Jake is showing no symptoms at all so it is looking good for him too.

3. Catching up on sleep.

Our entire household has been sleep deprived this week, primarily due to bad dreams or worrying. This weekend we can all catch up.

Ok... that's all my sleepy noggin can produce right now! Happy weekend folks!

Perspective

So I was really upset over possibly losing the house yesterday. Then I got the news about Lucy and Jake and it clarified everything for me.

Our little family has lived over a year in our apartment. It hasn't always been fun, but it's doable. And if we need to live another year there we will.

But our family is tight. We love each other very much. The loss of any of our members, even the newest one, is so much more important that the building where we keep our stuff. While I'll continue working on the house stuff, my priority is making sure that we do everything we can for our pups.

I also have to say that I felt completely blessed yesterday when faced with the prospect of spending $500 to save a pound puppy to have a husband who wasn't even the least bit hesitant. And, of course, there have been times when $500 would have been prohibitive, so I'm glad we're at a place where we could handle it without concern.

But please keep us all in your thoughts and prayers.

Prayer Request

Our new pup, Lucy, has parvo. She's been put in the hospital. Please pray that she can pull through. Also, please pray that Jake did not get infected. He's had two parvo shots and is getting a booster one today, but we'll have to watch him carefully.

My heart is breaking right now and I haven't even had to face the kids yet.

Here are the facts...

Well it turns out that while I had been marveling at how much easier the house buying process was this time around, I just hadn't gotten far enough for it to get really messy. I hit that point yesterday afternoon. I had been operating under the assumption that the bank lady had been honest with me and that, when she said that everything looked good, it was basically a done deal.

To be blunt, the house may not happen. I should know today.

If she says no, we will go somewhere else and see what happens. I find it all very confusing, but that's not really surprising. I don't have a mind for this kind of thing.

Yesterday, I was devastated. In my mind, we were just about to move in so to be knocked back so hard and so fast was rough. It took some time before I could step back and see the full picture. Worse case scenario, we're stuck in our ghetto apartment for a few more years with a pretty considerable amount of disposable income. While we would of course be squirreling away money for future house buying, we could also be doing some wonderful traveling. And we'd all love that.

Anyway, everything is quite a bit hazier than it was a day ago. I can see the good and bad in both sides of things so we'll see what happens. I'm sure the result will be good for us one way or another.

Too tired to talk...

So here's a lovely pic of Lucy and Jake bonding.